A Letter to My Younger Self
Last month, I wrote a blog about my musings on my life plan from my 12-year-old self (you can read it here).
The gist: I really thought I was going to be a millionaire by 32 with multiple houses, too many cars to count, and a big canoe (if you read the blog, I repeat, don’t ask). While I laughed a lot, it was really eye-opening (and a little disappointing) to see that so much of my worth was tied up in my financial status and my subscription to societal norms.
There were so many things I wanted to tell 12-year-old Tara as I thumbed through the literal pages of this book, running my fingers over the pencil scratchings (let’s be honest, my handwriting was probably better back then than it is now).
And then I realized the beauty of capturing those words. Now. Nearly 20 years later. Completely inspired by myself. In reflection to an assignment that my teacher had “made me do” so many years before. And while I’d love to pencil scratch this letter next to the OG version, like I said, my handwriting now leaves a lot to be desired.
Because writing it out on the Internet just makes so much more sense (right?!).
“Heres’s to Strong Women.
May we know them.
May we be them.
May we raise them.”
-Unknown
Dear past Tara,
If I can instill in you one thing, just ONE thing, I want you to know that you are perfect just the way you are.
You do not have to conform to societal standards in order to attain happiness.
There is no one policing that you be prettier for the boys. Honestly, the whole beauty industry is a complete racket. It will convince you that you are not enough in order to sell you potions and machines and programs that will supposedly fix you. They will not fix you. You don’t need to be fixed. So just stop worrying about your skin, hair, nails, looks (and the list goes on). Own every inch of you, and teach the world that they can do it, too.
Whatever you want to be, do it.
You don’t have to be the best at school (speaking of rackets, that is also one). You will disagree with your parents. Good. I have a secret, all people disagree with their parents at some point in life (anyone who says they didn’t is lying). Life is about learning how to face disagreement with integrity and authenticity. Don’t blend in. Don’t say what people want to hear.
Speak. Challenge. Ask why. Listen. And then don’t you dare be afraid to speak again.
Strength is cool. With your words. With your body. With your mind. And you will grow up to help thousands of women understand this.
Life is SO fun. Like, the actual MOST fun. Which is not to say that there won’t be really ugly days or seasons of your life where you’ll barely sleep because you’re trying to build your own business, but it’s only because of those moments that the best days are so much better.
You’ll think a lot of things about how life should be. Most of the time, those things will shoot far outside your expectations. Sometimes it will be worse; other times it will be better. You’ll learn that when you stop with the expectations, the more comfortable you are with being present...like truly present.
Above all, be grateful. You will look back from your thirties and want to redo a lot of your life choices, and then you’ll realize that it is only because of those choices that you can so confidently stand in your self-acceptance. Own all of them, and never be afraid to speak your truth in the name of letting women know that they - that we - are not alone.
Love,
Me
P.S.
2020 is a real doozie. Don’t worry, you’re going to be just fine.
A Little Montage of Past Tara for You
(what I would give to be on one of these beaches right now!)
